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Do You Suffer from Pronoia?

I first learned about this rare condition while traveling in Sedona a few years back. I was sitting in a coffee shop and noticed a large book on an end table entitled PRONOIA by Rob Brezsny. Given that I had never heard that word before, I curiously picked it up and began reading. The book gave an in depth explanation of this condition as well as hundreds of remarkable anecdotes and examples of its manifestation in people all over the world.  What is it, you ask? Well, in a sense it could be thought of as the opposite of paranoia. With paranoia we believe that the Universe cannot be trusted and intends us malice or harm. Pronoia is the belief that the Universe is conspiring (and trying its best) to shower us with blessings.
I really want to believe that this is the way the Universe operates, but I have found myself doubting this philosophy when something doesn’t go my way. Recently though, I decided that this is the kind of world I would like to live in so I am recommitting to this belief system. Whatever happens in my life experience, I will do my best to see it as a blessing that will enhance my existence (even if I can’t figure out what the blessing is in the short term). All of the people, resources, ideas, etc., that I need for my highest good will arrive in perfect timing because the Universe is conspiring in my favor. I will let you know how it goes…
How about you? Could you use a little case of Pronoia too?


When Your Dream Is Not Coming True

Do you have a desire in your life, one that you feel deep in your heart and soul, which has not manifested yet? Maybe you have even been working at something for a while, such as pursuing a new career/vocation, expressing your creativity, finding a life partner, or succeeding at any endeavor, but to no avail. If this is your current situation I would like you to consider 2 possibilities for being where you are.

The first possibility is that you are still holding on to doubt, resistance, or limiting beliefs that are preventing you from experiencing it—which means you are not ready for it yet. As much as you may want it to, the Universe cannot break its own laws and give you something that is not an energetic match (and even if it could, it loves you too much to do that). This would mean that something could manifest in your life before you have transformed yourself and reached the vibrational state necessary to receive it. It would be like getting a gold medal without even finishing the race. Is that what you really want? How satisfying would that be? So relax and KNOW that the timing will be perfect—it can’t be otherwise.

The second possibility is that there is another version of your dream (probably greater and more in alignment with you) that is on the way. The only problem is your tunnel vision of how you think it should come and what it should look like is preventing it from manifesting. This doesn’t mean give up and stop pursuing. It just means to be open and available to other possibilities as you joyfully move toward the dream. Stay open to the possibility that there are other routes or other versions of manifestation that could be just as or more rewarding than your original vision. Remember that your human perspective is limited, but your Spirit has a view of the entire landscape and can see the whole picture. Stay open and TRUST it.

BTW I wrote this to myself--just thought I would share it with you.



Facing The Dragon That Guards The Treasure 

Sarah was a treasure hunter searching for the most precious heirloom in the world. It was so rare that only ONE existed in the entire Universe. Long ago, she was given information from a wise guru that she was the only soul who could retrieve this treasure. He told her that it was impossible to move from its resting place unless her hands touched it. She knew this was her destiny, and it became her life long mission to find it. It was rumored that dragons sometimes attack people who search for such treasures, so she was wearing a large, heavy suit of armor to protect herself. Even though it was cumbersome and uncomfortable, she wore the armor just in case she came across any fire-breathing dragons.

Finally, after many years of searching, her journey was nearly complete. Just ahead through a narrow passageway, she could see the heirloom waiting to be discovered! She could hardly contain her excitement until she realized there was a big problem. In order to retrieve it, she would have to take off her armor to fit through the passageway. The opening was so narrow that there was no way to squeeze through it with the armor on. But she worried that the dragon was waiting on the other side protecting the treasure. What a predicament for her! Without the armor she could be badly burned or maybe even killed by the dragon. Yet, she wanted this treasure more than anything. What should she do? What would you do?

More often than not, we choose to play it safe and not take the risk (at least I do). We may rationalize this decision and convince ourselves that we really didn’t want the heirloom anyway. Or we may stand in front of the passage with our armor on for days, weeks, even years, feeling a tremendous yearning or inner conflict that will not subside. We really want it but we are afraid to go get it. What if we’re not capable? What if we fail? What if we are not worthy to receive it?

This dilemma is representative of arriving at a growing edge, when we are striving for something important in our lives. And standing there at that growing edge it becomes apparent that we will have to take a “risk” in order to proceed forward. Whether we want to attract more wealth, find a life partner, move into a new career/vocation, create a work of art, or whatever it may be, it is important to recognize that the goal or accomplishment we are seeking is NOT the heirloom. The actual heirloom is the new self that we must allow to emerge and express itself in the world. In other words, the real reason to strive for goals and accomplishments is to transform into a greater version of ourselves—to become (or realize) the person who can achieve it. The armor is the old self that we are afraid to shed, so we often just keep holding on to it. We believe that armor protects us and keeps us safe, but we cannot become the greater version of ourselves while still holding on to the old self.

But on rare occasions, usually when we just can’t stand to feel stuck anymore, we gather the courage to take off that armor and go through the passage. When we finally make it to the other side to retrieve that most precious treasure, we come face to face with that guardian dragon we feared so much, and it turns out to be a tiny lizard that couldn’t hurt a fly (well, actually they eat flies but you get my drift).

What is the greater version of you (the treasure) that wants to come forth and shine through? Are you ready to let go of that armor to make space for your greatness to blossom?




Don't Make the Mistake of Tolerance in Your Relationship

One of the biggest mistakes we can make in our relationships with significant others is to sit back and wait for a problem to surface, struggle with it for a long time, and then decide to try and get help with it. Another version of this is to gradually become disconnected and wait until we feel miles apart to try and reconnect. The problem with this is that the longer we stay in a rift, the more challenging it is to repair and reconnect. I have found that it is so much more effective to be proactive, continuing to nurture connection and intimacy so that the problems do not become so large and difficult to manage. Being proactive can take many forms, such as reading books about relationships together, taking personal or couple retreats, participating in workshops/classes, scheduling time to connect, going to couples therapy for a check up, learning new communication tools, or any other form of growth-oriented activity that deepens connection.

Many of us have gotten so good at tolerating friction and feeling disconnected that it becomes the norm. So I urge you, no more tolerance of so much strain or even mediocrity in your relationship. Time to take action now!

We still have a few spots left on our upcoming Relationship Tune Up Workshop. If you are interested in deepening your connection with your partner, please visit   for more information.



This is a Test--This is Only a Test.

What challenge are you facing in your life right now? Whether the challenge is related to finances, relationship, self worth, self image, health, career/vocation, please listen:

“This is a Test. This is only a test. Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. This has been a test of the Universal Broadcast System to see how you might respond to this challenge in your life. If you passed this test and responded with any of the following qualities: compassion, trust, love, forgiveness, empowerment, joy, equanimity, then you will no longer need to take this test. If, however, you continued to react in fear, worry, doubt, anger, frustration, resentment, or as a victim, then we will have to keep administering this test (because we love you too much to give up on you).”